align my heart, my body, my mind - The Egyptian Revolution

The Egyptian Revolution changed the opinions of many people around the world of what it means to be Arab, whether Muslim or Christian, and how hard we have to fight for freedom, democracy, and our basic human rights. Maybe some people realized they shouldn’t take the rights they have for granted. If anything, people recognized that the Egyptian people are strong and will fight for what they believe in.

January 25 was Police Day, and it was no secret that protests were being planned against former President Mubarak. However, no one knew it would actually amount anything. Even the people planning the protest over facebook, twitter, etc. had no idea how massive this would become. We had school the rest of the week, but there was going to be another huge protest on Friday, January 28. My students told me to stay inside and not leave on that day. I thought, “Whatever… this will blow over and everything will be fine.” I told them I’d see them on Sunday, InshaAllah. I want to tell an honest story of what happened during the whole revolution. It might be long, and my parents might freak out because I haven’t told them or anyone from back home what really happened. But… I feel like I need to for many reasons. I’ll start my story with Thursday night, the night before the big protest.

Everything was completely normal. I even went out with my Egyptian friend to a restaurant in Maadi. We hadn’t seen each other in a while, and we ended up hanging out at my house until 3 AM. I knew that he was going to be protesting the next day in Tahrir Square, so I told him to be safe and he left and I went to bed. I should mention that my best friend here was out of town in London at a job fair at this time, as was 90% of the administration from my school.

I woke up the next day, Friday, and realized that my phone had no service. I couldn’t call or text. I thought it was strange. The other weird thing was that I had no internet. Keep in mind that in Egypt, internet comes and goes all the time so this wasn’t that weird. But I was a little freaked out that I was completely cut off from the world. I hung out in my house all day, completely oblivious to what was happening outside in Tahrir Square. I should also mention that I don’t live anywhere NEAR the square. It is all the way downtown, about 45 minutes from my neighborhood. Unbeknownst to me, there was a 7:00 PM curfew. Sitting around all day not knowing what was happening made me anxious. I thought maybe it was just me who didn’t have internet. I decided to leave my apartment at around 7:30 (after curfew) to walk to the near internet café and see if I could use the internet there to check what was happening. I walked outside and to the Road 233, near where I live and a lot of shops are. There was no one on the street. I mean no one. And all the shops were closed except for one small grocery store. So I went in the store, bought some water, and went home. I was freaked out then. I went through all my channels until I found CNN and then I realized what was happening…

The next day, Saturday, was probably one of the scariest days/nights in my life. We finally got cell phone service back, but still no internet (we didn’t have internet for over a week). I called my friend who was in London because I knew her dog was still here. She had a dogsitter, but I didn’t know if she could get to the dog, Gizmo. My friend wanted me to go to her house, get the dog (even if I had to have her bowaab break down the door) and bring Gizmo back to my house. I told her I didn’t know how bad things were going to get here… so I went to rescue Gizmo. Her bowaab crawled through her balcony door to get him for me, and I brought him back here. The streets were a little crazy and everyone seemed slightly frantic, but I still thought things would be fine.

But then it got dark outside. I was glued to CNN and heard that thousands of prisoners were released from prison. My apartment is directly across the highway from a prison. There was also constant (every 30-40 seconds) gunshots. I’m from a small town, so I’m obviously not used to this and I had no idea what was happening. People from the school kept calling me and checking on me, and school was cancelled Sunday and Monday. Then, groups of men started forming outside my building with different weapons: knives, big sticks, etc. I didn’t know what they were doing. Were they going to break into my apartment? There was also a lot of yelling in Arabic along with gunfire. Then, over the loudspeakers where the calls to prayer are, a man said something in Arabic. My friend called me and told me that they were calling for all the men from the buildings to come outside and help them protect the cars and buildings. I didn’t know what from. All the police were told to leave the area, so we had no protection. And prisoners were just released, and there were looters going around and breaking into buildings. So the men from all the buildings in my neighborhood formed vigilante/militia groups and protecting the buildings all night. They also formed road blocks and checked everyone’s vehicles and ID’s who came through them.

I was alone with Gizmo. I locked my door, put my chair against it along with my coffee table in case someone tried to break in. I also kept a large kitchen knife by me all night. I watched CNN, cried, and started packing my bags. I wasn’t ready to leave Cairo. I love Cairo and I didn’t want to have to move home and be unemployed. I guess I wasn’t thinking straight. But I was terrified at what was happening outside and all the gunshots and yelling. I kept peeking outside to make sure the men were still there and that everything was okay. I stayed up all night.

The next day was Sunday. We heard that all Americans were advised to leave the country. Shit. I can’t leave. Plus, I had my friend’s dog and I couldn’t leave him. I called my parents and cried on the phone. There were helicopters overhead when I told my dad that I didn’t know what to do and that I was scared. People might be wondering why I never evacuated… my plan was to always stay in a group. If a group decided to leave, I would leave with them. If a group decided to stay, I would stay. My plan changed every hour. I kept thinking that if tomorrow was better, I would stay. If it was worse, I would leave. Then tomorrow would come and everything would be the same. So I would think that I would magically know what to do the next day. But the answer never came. I never knew what to do, what the right thing was. If I leave, where do I go? Come all the way back to Wisconsin, spend all that money, then maybe have to come back in 2 days? It didn’t seem logical to me. Plus, the US evacuation plan was shit. I already wrote a blog entry about it though. I think one of the most depressing things about this situation was that I lost faith in my country when I had complete faith in them at the beginning. My feelings have shifted.

Anyway, I stayed with 2 of my friends on Sunday night because I couldn’t have a night like Saturday night. We made a beautiful dinner, had some wine, and tried to eat. However, there was still constant gunfire. At one point, we all started laughing at the absurdity of it. Here we were, trying to have a nice dinner, and all we can hear is gunfire. It was actually really hilarious. Sunday night was better than Saturday, I probably got about 3 hours of sleep.

Monday came and school was cancelled until further notice. Protests were continuing and Mubarak showed no signs of stepping down. I went to the grocery store and waited in line for over an hour for food. Another concern I had was what would happen when we ran out of food, out of water. That night I stayed with 2 other friends because the friends I stayed with on Sunday night evacuated to Frankfurt. People kept leaving in small numbers to different countries. The next morning, I left right after curfew, at 8 AM because my friend was coming back from London. I walked past all the vigilante groups on the streets and everyone stopped me and told me it wasn’t safe to be out. I told them I was just walking trying to get a cab to Rd. 233 because I needed to get home. They told me I was like their sister and they would protect me and they walked me to find a cab.

After that, I stayed with my friend who came back from London. I brought all my food to her house, and we stayed there with another one of our friends and Gizmo of course. Gizmo also helped me get through the bad night. It sounds stupid, but it would have been so much worse if he weren’t there. He stayed by me all night (and all the rest of the nights) like he was protecting me. He’s a small dog, but he has a big bark. A lot of Egyptians don’t like dogs, so I also figured if someone tried to break in, they would run screaming when they heard Gizmo!

My friend and I decided to book a flight to Istanbul. The curfews were starting at 1 PM. You could go out for a few hours in the morning, that was it. I was sitting around all day, eating food, watching the news, and drinking. It’s all I could do. And I drank a lot. Drinking also helped me get through! The school paid for us to go to Ain Sukhna (about an hour and a half outside of Cairo) on the Red Sea for the weekend. We were going to do that, then to go Istanbul. Then we cancelled our trip because school was supposed to start. Then school was delayed another week. Then we booked a flight to Rome leaving the next day. I needed to get out for a while.

That’s where I’ll stop the story for now. The revolution was… difficult. I’m still having a hard time I guess because I lived through it, I was here, but I’m not Egyptian. So in many ways, I’m not a part of it. It’s not my victory. But at the same time, I was here too. So I’m strangely stuck in the middle. I’m happy for them and what they’ve accomplished, but I’m not Egyptian. This isn’t my country, but it is my home. So where does that leave me? Not that this is about me at all, but I’m just feeling a little isolated. I went to Tahrir Square today for the celebrations and memorial which helped. Everyone was smiling, singing, playing music, and chanting. It was joyous and I was so glad to be there. People kept saying “Welcome to Egypt!” and asking to take our picture with their children, or just of us with our Egyptian flags. We were like the foreign celebrities in Tahrir Square for the day. It was a lot of fun and I feel like I am kind of a part of this. People would also give us the thumbs up sign, or just yell “Masr!” because of our flags. It was great.

There were many difficult times, but I’m also grateful that I was a witness to history in Egypt. Of course now my future here is in jeopardy. I know that Egypt will never be what I knew it to be, but I hope it will be better. I love it here; my heart is here. But the future is also uncertain. I hope that Masr (Egypt in Arabic) will be better and that the people will ultimately get what they want. Viva ya Masr.